ScoliosisBirdy has come to TWITTER! @Summerbirdy

Oops almost forgot! i am now addicted to Twitter. Please follow me @Summerbirdy.

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thank you

6 Months Post Op

Hello,

So i am FINALLY 6months post op!, i saw Mr Tucker just before i went on holiday last week and he seemed pleased. My shoulder aches are still there when i have had a busy day and so for that i just need to keep exercising, and i will look into Hydrotherapy too and let you know how i get on.

Thanks so much for your emails and i hope i am still managing to help some of you out.

handscanderson@gmail.com

Almost 6 Months

Hello,
Its been such a long while since i have written on my blog! as i am sure you can see. This is mainly down to the fact that things have been at a constant.
Firstly i am SO HAPPY with the results, one of the hardest things i have ever done but one of the best too.
I am pretty much back to normal except that around 2-3pm my shoulder/arm hurts, its the muscles and resting makes it ok.
I am off on holiday to Egypt next week and i am planning to completely relax (been super stressed lately). I know the flight is going to be particularly uncomfortable so i am going armed with alot of pillows.
I see Mr Tucker on the Monday morning and i get the xrays and see if everything is as it should be and then i flyyyy off!.
Thanks again for all the emails i get, i reply to the majority so please if you have any questions etc.. then please get in touch! handscanderson@gmail.com

Chrissy

My Post Surgery Xrays!!

Hello,

I have just received my xrays in the post and personally i think they are amazing, it really does NOT feel like i have this lot inside my body.

A bad comparision that i knocked together:

Post Surgery Questions

Thank you OnePhatChick for your comment you wanted to know some things about Scoliosis Surgery so I will try and answer as best I can J.

Has my life changed since the surgery – Well it is only 2 months on and I am just in the middle of trying to get my life back, but I have to say that I did used to think about my Scoliosis everyday, in fact numerous times aday. It was always a negative thought as well, constantly shifting my body to try and alleviate the pain or stop my hip sticking out. Now I still think about my back all the time, maybe even more if the truth be told, but it’s a great thought!! I think about how happy I am with my back and how I don’t get that CONSTANT nagging pain anymore, and how I feel straight and symmetrical.

Did I get taller – I indeed got 3cm’s taller! I love it I am now about 5ft 7! I notice this when I put my old dresses on and they seem shorter, and when I keep bumping my head on the bus ceiling at the back.

Do I love my new waist –  Apart from the abolishment of my pain this is the part I love the most!. Its always been the one thing I have never had, and I didn’t hate my body before but im soo sooo so pleased with this, I really need to start investing in some belts to show it off!. I thought my clothes taste would entirely change once I had a wait but I still go for the same old things I would have done before.

Is my range of motion very restrictive – Not at all, I really thought it would be but I barely notice it. I think I am a lot more aware at the moment of trying not to twist and bend too much, but once I get the all clear to do these things the only way I notice how restrictive I am is when I try and shave my legs! Which I cant do in the shower anymore. I need to be out of the bath and put one leg up and do it that way. Once I can have baths again I think ill be find doing it in the bath. Havent tried it yet but I think painting my toenails might be tricky too.

Am I comfortable sitting up now or do I lay down most of the time – I never lay down in the day anymore, I sit on all different chairs, some are more comfy than others. Before surgery I used to find it hard sitting on picnic benches or stalls or anything that didn’t have a back to it, but now I feel like I have my own built in back support so when I am sit unsupported I am just as comfortable as I am when I am sat back. I do put pillows behind me when I am relaxing on chairs at home but this is mainly because otherwise I feel like the chair is pushing my head forward. I don’t know if I have explained it that well but its just a lot more comfy for me.

I really do feel almost back to normal, the first few weeks after surgery I never thought I would do. I get muscle aches now I am going back to work but that’s all healing pains and although its not pleasant its manageable. I would do it all again in a heartbeat, it was painful and frustrating but worth it!.

I would like to point out thought that this is just my experience and Mr Tucker said I seem to have had ‘an easy run of it’. J xx

Back to Work i Go

So 8 weeks post op i decided to give work ago.
I definitely over did it. It is a phased return so i should have tried a few hours on my first day but i stupid left the house at 9am and then returned at 5.15pm. Dont get me wrong, i wasnt in work all that time i took the commute very slowly, but id still didnt get a seat either way!.
By the time i got home i was feeling pretty uncomfortable but as the night went on i was in quite abit of discomfort, it wasnt full on agony and i didnt take any pain killers but i was VERY pleased to see my bed and slept like a log!.
Its so hard to know your limits, if you are ok 99.99% of the time how do you know how much you cant do. I think its safe to say i hit my limits yesterday.
Im not sure now how to handle this phased return and i am feeling abit miserable today as i feel like i am letting people down at work. I am working from home though, i just wish i lived closer to the office.
I just need to keep the positive attitude as i know i am flying through my recovery and i am getting abit spoilt by it so when something goes wrong i get really upset.
Anyway onwards and upwards.

I Feel Normal

Hello Everyone,
I just wanted to let you all know that today i realised i feel pretty normal, i have an achey neck/shoulder but thats it!
I think i have felt this way for a good week maybe 2 weeks but its only really just hit me.
I am going to start going back to work next week but the mean time i am doing all my work from home and really enjoying it.
I am so happy i had this operation, so far it has gone better than i could have expected.
My life is just going so well at the moment as the operation is out of the way i feel i have not a care in the world. My boyfriend has decided to move in with me in Woking and so i am so  pleased to have him around all the time and i have moved back into my own little house now too.
I hope my 3 month check up with Mr Tucker goes well now...
Thank you all again for your support getting emails from strangers who really care is so nice and uplifting, especially when my spirits were low.
thanks again.

Chrissy

My 1st trip back to work.

Today was the first time I have been back into my office. I am not ready to start back at work just yet, but I am lucky as I can work from home. I wanted to go into the office though to see everyone as I have missed them all so much. I really do love my job and everyone there as sad as it sounds so I was so excited go get back t say hello. I was also really excited to see how well i would do as it's so hard to know your limit's unless you push yourself to the point where you hurt, and I don't really wanna be in pain all the way out in London.
I left about 11.30am and didn't get home until 5pm and I was fine! No pain, I met Lindsay and Charles for lunch and had a big chat to Lainey, then went downstairs and saw loads of my friends everyone said how great i looked and what brilliant posture I now have.
I'm so happy today, I feel like that was a big milestone in my recovery and I feel like I can do most things now, the only things i really can't do is carry anything heavy and drive very far in my car, but I am so happy to feel normal and I'm so pleased I have had this operation.
Now I am having my work laptop sent home  so I will make sure I update more often of any significant changes.
Love to you all C x x x

Driving for the 1st time

5.5 weeks post op I plucked up the courage to drive. Just a very short drive which was from my house back to my dads house, it only takes about 5mins but it was absolutely fine!
Since then I have driven this route 3 or 4times and it's fine, just like driving before.
Yesterday was 6weeks post op and I went to the pub for the first time with my best friend Rikki as she was running a Karaoke night with her dad and I chatted go her for a couple of hours and then drove home, this was a slightly longer 10mins drive but it was great, I turned up my radio and had a big sing to myself which I haven't done in ages!
Oh also yesterday I got my hair cut and coloured which took 3hrs of sitting in the hair dressers, again it was fine and I came out feeling all human and refreshed. It's horrible how gross I felt post surgery I didn't think I would ever feel pretty again but I do now. Woo!

1st Night in MY OWN House

So at 5weeks and 2days post op i decided it was time that I could stay home on my own.
So last Saturday Tim came and picked me up and we cooked breakfast, and then took Alan into London to hang out with Nicole (Tims sister) and then we went to Tims and let Splat our Chinchilla out (he is staying with Tim while i recover) and watched a film and by the time we got back to my house I was so tired (and so was tiny Alan!).
it was fine staying in my own bed, I was out of my comfort zone so of course I worried a bit especially going into London as you don't know what kind of chairs people are going to have but I have noticed that I can just sit up without having a chair back to lean on, before my operation sitting on the floor in a field or a picnic bench would be my idea of hell, they used to really hurt after a while, but now it's like I have my own built in chair back. I feel so supported and happy to sit upright without leaning back it's brilliant, I don't now feel like I have an ironing board stuck to my back, I feel like I have great posture and i feel like my back is normal.

4 Week Check Up with Mr Tucker

Hello, sorry it's taken so long to update you all. I will fill you in what's been going on in the last 2 weeks but I will do it under a couple of headings.
So this one was my 4 weeks check up. Obviously knowing me I was scared about the journey as it's so far (1.5hrs)' but my dad drove me and I had pillows and reclined the seats,  I made it there pretty much pain free!. After abit if confusion about what building I was ment to go too I finally arrived at my appointment. It started to get in abit of as by the time i finally got to my appointment i was about 30mins late and sat in a really uncomfy chair and i didnt have my pillow, i mainly think this was due to worry though and i was very tense, once i got in to see Mr Tucker i forgot about that and I was SO happy for Mr Tucker to tell me I could drive!!! I wasn't prepared for that. He also said i was at the top rate of the recovery and we discussed me going back to work, as it's quite a long commute I have to do, it's been decided to have a phased return from mid July. I have to go back and see him in August for my 3 month check and then i will get x-rays taken and see how the actual fusing of the bones is getting on (argh!)
so all in all I was up and about that day for about 5hrs, by the time I got home I was a bit achey and I played with the idea of having a pain killer but in the end I just rested for 30mins or so and I felt ok again. That's the thing with any pain I have been getting lately it's not like the pain from before, before I would need to lay down all night and then have a lay in the in the morning the be able to get over the pain. But now I just lay down and it's gone. So all in all it was a very good day.

My Scar

Oh this is a picture of my back before and after. I'm really pleased with the scar and all things going well should heal to just a tiny silver line. Perfecto.

 Before:

After:

Wonderful Weekend

Evening everyone! I had a really nice weekend of MOVEMENT!.
Tim came round on Saturday and we sheepishly made our way to the skanky pub round the corner from my dads house (it never used to be so run down, was shocking!) after discovering they did serve food anymore we settled down to enjoy our J2Os.

After managing to sit for 30mins and feeling fine we then ventured to Waitrose just next door to pick up a nice lunch of French stick, boursin and tomatoes yummmmm.



Again no real pain but when we got back I was ready to lay down.
After about an hour rest I then took Alan for a 20min walk, I was so happy to feel normal, also I was excited that I used some energy and may be able to sleep easily.
Sunday was good too, I woke up with a tummy ache (which I seem to most mornings at the moment), but Tim came over and we had a little drive out for lunch taking my trusty pillow again! The seat was maybe slightly too upright or something but it really hurt, we were there for about 30mins and it was very uncomfortable and I just wanted to get back to bed. But I was still happy I was out and going in the car and not feeling like a prisoner.

After a long rest I decided I wanted Nandos and a mcflurry, so a car ride later I was stuffing my face!
So my friends that is my recovery, if I had a chauffeur I would be laughing.

Brace Relief!

So as you all know I have not been getting on well with my brace at all!. It just really hurts and I actually can't breathe properly in it, which initially I put down to my panicking problems but the longer it's gone on the more I really don't think that's the problem at all.
Anyway yesterday I wore it out and it was just agony, I was almost in tears during the entire 10min walk, so I called Mr Tuckers secretary Sharon and she said she would speak to the nurse who said she would email Mr T, he replied this morning and said I would be ok wearing just my corset. I'm so happy, it's a massive weight off my mind, but me being me I will still worry anyway about EVERYTHING!.
I'm still yet to do a walk in just the corset but as it's so hot outside I will wait until later anyway.
I'm so bored and quite lonely BUT I'm starting to see progress and I'm optimistic I won't be out of action for long at all!
Thank you again for your emails!!!!, anyone else wanting to get in touch and help break up my boredom or anyone facing surgery with questions, comments please email me on handscanderson@gmail.com

Cxxxxxx

Thin as a rake!

Hello everyone, sorry I haven't written for so long but there really hasn't been much going on AT ALL.
I spend most days in bed watching daytime TV, I get up for a couple of walks, to go to the loo etc.. But except for that I don't really do anything.
As you know I am off my hard drugs and feel abit of discomfort in the night but I'm tough as old boots so I just deal with it now and I find laying on my sides and switching up positions really helps.
The area around my scar and pretty much all my back is still completely numb to the point that I lost my mobile and didn't realise I was laying on it for ages, it's soo weird.
Thanks again for all your lovely comments and emails, it really perked me up and helped me out of my slump, I really do hope I have helped other people facing surgery have an idea of what to expect. I am the biggest baby EVER and if I can do it anyone can!.
I can't wait to get back to normal and really start to enjoy life, and sadly I can't wait to get back to work.
9 days until my appointment with Mr Tucker, I'm abit nervous I hope he says everything is healing ok!. Oh I do love that talented chap.

Oh also I forgot to mention I have lost a stone since surgery!, I now weigh under 7 stone. My dad is freaking out and obviously I am upset as I am as thin as a rake anyway and I like my little 8stone body. Dad is on and on about eating and the pressure and worry just puts me right off eating. I'm gonna try not to worry about it as it will make it worse and I know as soon as I can cook, shop and drive I will b straight to get pizzas, and oreo milkshakes in their thousands. Yummmmmmmmmmmmm whenever I'm stressed or upset the first thing to go on me is weigh, it will all come back soon.

The Slump

Hello,
So as you can guess from the title I have hit 'The Slump'. I feel so incredibly bored and uncomfortable it is getting hard to remain upbeat and see an end to this. I can't imagine my back ever feeling normal or part of me. I know this 'Slump' is natural and in my head as I have read on the forums others going through it.
I was more than braced for pain when I went in for my operation and on that I was pleasantly surprised, but looking back I really don't think I was ready for the emotional side of things and I really don't think I'm handling it all that well.
I don't want to be all doom and gloom so I want to let you know that I am off pain medication. I slowly eased myself off it and I'm happy because these things are so strong I really didn't want to get addicted. I am in a wee bit of pain now and again but I'm ok really and if it did get that bad I'd just take something.
So I'm sorry this post isn't very upbeat, I hope I do cheer up soon. I cannot wait to be able to eat sitting up and just feel more comfortable, I am sure that will help my mood.
Everyone keeps saying I am over the worst and doing really well but I think this is by far the worst part. No choice now though but the hang in there.
X x x

Back brace hell

Hey ya, Straight Back Chrissy here! I really mean it, my back is awesome. Mr Tucker and his team are amazing, I can't wait to tell him how pleased i am with the results when I see him in 2 and a bit weeks.
Life is pretty boring, laying about and walking occasionally, I really want to sit in a chair but wearing this back brace is a nightmare, it's sooooooo uncomfortable, I really am sure it is hindering my recovery rather than helping it. I know the drs and nurses know best but it's a nightmare.
My pain must be getting better as twice I have missed my doses of painkillers and not even noticed, I just miss them out completely and carry in taking it at the next scheduled time. I did wake up in a bit of pain last night though and took a Tramadol.
Also I think because I lay about all night and I am not using any energy in the evening I feel so anxious and i cannot keep my feet still, I sounds annoying but it's CRAZY, I makes me wanna bite myself out of frustration or pull my hair our or something. Anyway online today I was looking up something else and I actually found something called 'Restless Feet Syndrome' hownweird is that! I hope I don't end up with that as that surely will send me to the loony bin.
Still waiting on my key board so I will sign off now, but i am still alive and still very much happy, incredibly frustrated but totally optimistic.
5th day of Alan sitting on my bed.....poor little puppy is woRried about his mum :)

I am back walking

Hello,

Chrissy back again! This will probably be short and sweet as I am writing from an iPad and it's not easy!.
So I went home on 8days post surgery and the drive was fine, I was worried about the pain as usual but it really wasn't bad!, this surgery can actually be very suprising when you constantly think the worst.
I have been getting on ok since being home just always uncomfortable. You get used to having an electric bed at hospital and having metal bed sides and you start to rely on them and so when you get home you start again. I am very up and down at the moment, yesterday I felt pretty useless but today I don't!!!!! I just managed a 20min walk! I am so so so so pleased because I have been finding my brace so hard to get used to, don't get me wrong I'm still not there but I'm getting there and that's what counts and what will keep my spirits up! Woo!.
I really want to write an indepth entry on my hospital stay and I will soon as soon as I get a keyboard, but I do want to say for anyone heading towards surgery and is worried about pain, I am the biggest wimp ever ever ever and the pain was not the worst part, they really can control it, you will worry anyway but you will be very surprised.
Tomorrow I hope to manage another hurdle, would be nice if I can have a meal sat up as I can't right now and it's so hard to eat and drink laying down.
Xxxxxx

First Week Post Scoliosis Surgery

Hi thought I should give every on an update because it’s been some time since I posted and getting the hard word from the missus! Nice to have her slightly back to normal :)... So it’s been about 1 week today since her op and it has certainly been up and down...

Chrissy's bandage (Haven't managed to get one with it off yet, but I will)

Day two after the op was surprising good... I was so pleased how Chrissy was doing, she was perky and reasonably upbeat considering what she had been through. The nurse came in first thing in the morning and took her ‘space boots’ as she called them off. These were basically inflatable lower leg wraps which stopped her getting Deep Vein Thrombosis while she was immobile. Mr Tucker came to visit about midday to check up on her. He said she was certainly ahead of the game after standing on the first day but did say that she was probably on a high after having the op over and not to expect all days to be like this.

How right he was... Day 3 after the op was pretty much a 180 degree turn. Chrissy was very very ill, Im not sure it was because of the op and the general anaesthetic or because of the concoction of pain killers she was on. Lesser of two evils it seemed to me really, be in pain or feel sick because of the drugs... By this stage she had been taken of the intravenous morphine but was starting to really feel the pain. They decided to give her morphine orally which I don’t think was the best thing for her. After about an hour she started to dry retch which you can imagine must really hurt after major spinal surgery so they took action and gave her an anti-sickness shot in the bum. She had very little mobilisation on this day because of how bad she had been feeling and was still yet to eat anything.

Day 4 after the op was generally a good day, she woke up ate 3 triangles of toast, some carrots and potatoes for lunch, and a few bits of pasta and soup for dinner. This was the first day Chrissy had managed to eat at all since going under the knife. Being taken her off the morphine completely was the best thing for her in my opinion. Her friend Lindsay also came in to visit in the evening with Krispy Kremes which I am sure also cheered her up. About 10pm Chrissy started to experience quite bad back pain again, didn’t have a great sleep and woke up at 5am feeling really nauseous. The previous night she had had a lot of problems sleeping so they gave her a sleeping pill to knock her out but it didn’t seem to help a massive amount.

The nausea carried through to day 5 and the anti-sickness medicines were not working well at all. So I came up from work to spend some time with her in the hospital. Chrissy was finding it really difficult to drink and I was constantly on her back trying to get her to drink more. The nurses said this may be one of the reasons that she was getting so ill as she was not taking in enough fluids to flush her system of the medicine. One thing that did help her take in the water was eating ice chips. She didn’t eat any food on this day and I even had to hide it from her sight she felt so sick. One positive for the day was the man came in to make a cast for her back brace (picture below) and he said her back looked 10 out of 10!

Straight back Chrissy for the first time

Tim here again thought I would give you a bit of an update on what has been going on in the last few days since Blogger is now back up and running. Last time I mentioned how Dr Tucker told me how well the operation went. Since then both the Anesthetist and Dr Tucker have visited a couple of times to see how she has been doing and I have a few more details to share. 

So originally Chrissy was going to get a fusion from T2 to L4, during the op it was decided that a slightly smaller T2 to L3 fusion would be sufficient to get the straightening they were after which was great news. For those non scoliosis folk out there this basically means that the fusion of the spine is shorter by one vertebra in the lower back. This has means a couple of things, firstly that she will retain more flexibility and secondly apparently she will have a lower risk of getting further back pain in later life.

The other good news was that she didn’t have to have a Costoplasty also called a Thoracoplasty which is a cutting of specific sections of the ribs to realign them after the spine is rotated back to the normal position. Sometimes humps in the chest can form after the rotation which needs this cosmetic adjustment, apparently this is one of the parts of the op that can cause the most pain and prolong the recovery, lucky for us Chrissy didn’t need this :)

I first managed to see Chrissy after the op in the High Dependency Unit of Wellington Hospital a couple of hours after the surgery. As anyone who has taken a general she was pretty out to it, I stayed there until visiting hours where over about 10pm but didn’t manage to get much out of her except a couple mumbling. She had one on one care from the Nurses in HDU which was a nice relief as I knew she would be looked after.

All in all I think she looked amazing considering the trauma she had just been through. The Nurses had fitted her with a catheter so she didn’t have to get up to use the bathroom and she was receiving countless numbers of painkillers through her drip along with a self administering morphine shot to manage the pain if it got a little too much. The morphine worked a treat with the pain however it did mean she needed to be fed oxygen, it also had the side effect of causing nausea which needed to be managed with anti nausea drugs. 

Chrissy in HDU:

DAY 1 after the op:

Chrissy’s biggest fear was never the actual op, she seemed to have complete trust in the Dr Tucker and the team who were going to operate on her. She had done so much research about the procedure and understood everything that was involved and the risks she faced. It seemed to me the thing that scared her most was the potential pain after the operation. So far the team here has been amazing at managing the pain and she has hardly mentioned it, more talking about the general discomfort she is experiencing saying that she felt like she had an ironing board stuck in her back. Guess this is expected when you have a whole bunch of bolts, screws and rods placed in your back to make you straight!

Chrissy got transferred out of HDU to room 401 in the South Building today (if anyone fancies sending flowers ;)). First chore of the day was to sort out the bird’s nest that had somehow developed on her head over night.  If you are going through this op defo recommend putting your hair in plats so you don’t end up looking like a Rasta with one big dreadlock.

Pippy Longstockings:

Second chore of the day was to get the newly Straight Back Chrissy (yay!) out of bed! I know I couldn’t believe it either, so early after such a major op. We had a great Physio who really calmed down a slightly nervous Chrissy. She managed to roll onto her side and push herself up into a sitting position without too much difficultly. The Physio then fitted her for a corset which she is going to wear until she manages to get her back brace fitted next week which I think she is going to have to wear for a couple of months when she is moving about the place. 

After the corset was put on she managed to stand up and do a little march on the spot, I never had any idea that less than a day after major spinal surgery this sort of thing would be possible. She didn’t feel too much pain more discomfort before she was slightly overcome by nausea brought on by the 3 shots of morphine she took in anticipation of the Physio coming to make her stand up. 

All in all a pretty good day I think. Not to mention the truck loads of flowers, penguin and monkey she has received from all those that care. She loves them all!

Breaking News!

So Mr Tucker just called me and told me everything went fantastically with the operation. So pleased I feel like jumping over the moon.Waiting till we are allowed see her now, more to follow...

Scoliosisbirdy goes under the knife

Hi Tim (Chrissy’s boyfriend) here. I am helping the little scoliosis bird update her blog while she is unable to... Hopefully I don’t bore you are to death!

So this morning we got up at 4.30am to travel to Wellington Hospital for 7am. We arrived and got put into a lovely little room which I hope Chrissy will be comfortable in. From then on it was go go go we had a visit from the nurse to take more bloods, from the anaesthetist to explain how he was going to knock her out, a doctor responsible for monitoring the spinal cord during the op who attached as sorts of wires and ended up making her look a little like C-3PO from Starwars . Mr Tucker then paid us a visit to ask is we had any final questions before the op. Chrissy was getting a little anxious by this stage understandably, so she popped a couple of chill pills which seemed to relax her... In fact she said that I had developed 4 eyes and 2 mouths after taking them!  Where was mine I wanted to ask. Couple of photos:

Chrissy's Back Before:

Bleeding the bird:

Wiring the bird up:

I have to say Chrissy was amazing and so brave I can’t even imagine going through anything like this. I am so proud of how she has handled the lead up to this op.

I went down with the doctors to theatre to hold her hand while she went under at about 10.30am its now just passed 1.30pm so she is 3hrs into her op of what should be a 3 to 4 hour operation. I can’t explain how nervous and anxious I am feeling sitting in the hospital restaurant with her mum waiting for her. I can’t wait to see her little face again, give her a hug and kiss and know that everything has gone ok.

Will keep you updated.

Operation is TOMORROW!

So the big day is tomorrow, and im so nervous I don’t even feel like writing in my blog!, which is weird coz usually I love rambling on to myself and posting it online.

The best thing is that I am so busy at work and seeing people and sorting stuff out that I don’t really have too much time to wallow.

Funny how at times like this you really do find out who the people are that care about you, and luckily for me its sooo many people! J. I am sure all this support is going to make my recovery so much easier. From what I have read this next week will be the worst and then its mainly about keeping a positive attitude which anyone who knows me will know that’s NOT easy for me!! Hahahaha.

Anyway I guess I should sign off from this blog for now and when I next write in here I will be all straight backed. My boyfriend Tim have said he will update my blog with my progress.

Wish me luck!!!!

Strong As An Ox Chrissy xxx

3 days to go!!!!!!

I am finally back from my holiday!, I have to say I had the BEST time and I really think it was the best holiday I have ever had. I went to Thailand 4 years ago on the way back from Australia and New Zealand and I really did enjoy it then but this time it was SO much better!.

It really couldn’t have come at a better time, it took my mind off my operation so much I barely thought about it. I think I woke up once in the night from a nightmare about it but that was the only time.

Now I am back I have so much work to do and so much catching up with people and washing to do that I hope it will keep me preoccupied.

I do want to stress to you all that I AM SCARED. I am remaining up beat and busy but it doesn’t take away from the fact that I am scared, in fact I would go so far as to say I am petrified. But I think it is only normal. I am not worried about anyone messing up or anything like that I just know that this is going to be so painful and obviously no one likes pain. L.

I am getting so much support from my family, my boyfriend, my best friends, my work friends and my boyfriends parents have just been the absolute best J Not only did they put me and Tim up in the most amazing 5* hotel in Bangkok they also sent me a large voucher for Amazon so I can buy loads of books J

Thanks again for all the emails you have been sending me and I WILL reply before I go in for my operation.

Here is a nice relaxing picture of me happy in Thailand.

Pre-Op Assessment

Today was the day of my Pre Op exam and I was slightly nervous. Even for this!. I think it was the whole ‘blood taking business’.

Anyway I arrived early with my entourage of 1 boyfriend and the nurse asked me about 1 million questions, so many questions that I started to think I was lying and I was having trouble answering the easiest of questions because i kept thinking I was lying. Very weird!. Im sure its because I over think everything. But you don’t really want to lie on something like this as it all helps make your operation go as smoothly as possible.

So I got asked a lot of questions and had my blood pressure, ECG heart rate thing, checked for MRSA, and the bit I was dreading The Blood Tests. It actually wasn’t bad once she put the needle in she just filled up the vials and I was looking the other way speaking to the other nurse and to be honest I didn’t feel a thing, it was only when I looked down I saw she had filled up 6 little tubes. Im only teeny I didn’t know I could cope without that blood!, anyway its now the afternoon and im still alive so its ok.

I was given so much info on pain relief and what to expect that I feel calmer J.

Thank you again for the emails I have been getting. This blog is so therapeutic for me and I hope post surgery it might be useful for someone facing the same thing.

If you would like to email me you can at handscanderson@gmail.com

Scoliosis Spinal X Ray - The before pictures!

I got a CD with my spinal x rays on it. So I thought I would share these with you so you can see what Mr Tucker is going to be dealing with. These are me ‘straight’ on.

I have SOOO much to do this weekend, I am starting to think that booking a holiday right before surgery was not the smartest move. Although I had booked the holiday first so it was actually booking the surgery after the holiday, either way NOT smart as I have SO much to do.

I am picking a chair up this weekend so that is one thing I can tick off and my car passed its MOT today (woohooo). Also I got a lovely gift in the post at work yesterday, it was a kindle! A complete surprise a actually really thoughtful as it will be so easy for me to read on holiday now! (no packing heavy books) although I think Tim actually got it for me so it is easier for me to read in hospital, either way I am so pleased with it I have downloaded my first book and I can NOT put it down!.

Scoliosis is not ugly

I have been reading on the forums that girls with Scoliosis tend to suffer really low self confidence. Its made me really sad to read a whole thread about people going on holiday and not even wanting to wear a bikini because they are so paranoid about their spines. My Scoliosis is pretty bad 2 x mid 60 degree curves and obviously I don’t love having it but I have tried my hardest not to let it bother me, mainly because no one notices it unless they have it themselves. I have been out shopping or on the beach and seen another girl with Scoliosis but is purely because I am looking at peoples spines constantly. I am sure I am abit spine obsessed!

Scoliosis is one of those things that people only seem to notice when you point it out to them. To be honest I have never really ever told people about my back problem and only two people have ever mentioned it to me and that was a boyfriend who was rubbing sun cream into my back, and a photographer who didn’t realize it was my back that was the problem they thought it was my leg!. Im sure someone else noticed as well but they never said anything.

I did modeling for 2 years and was constantly getting dressed and undressed in front of people who were all looking at me and my Scoliosis was never a problem.

Spinal Fusion is a massive operation to undertake and I would never get it done for vanity purposes (and that’s saying a lot as I am the vainest personJ). I like the way I look even now and if my spine was stable I would not even consider this surgery. The fact is that my spine is getting worse and I will be in a lot more pain and that is my reason for surgery. Obviously I don’t want to be all curled up when I am older too.

In this picture you can notice my back is not as flat as it should be, but would the untrained eye?

In these pictures you can see my hip sticks out more than the other, but would anyone ever notice?

But this is my fav body shot as I don’t think you can tell at all J trick photography!

Length of Fusion T2 to L4

So I spoke to Mr Tuckers secretary to find out how long my fusion will be and when you actually look it up on a diagram of a spine it doesn’t look too cool.

I will be fused from T2 to L4. ARGH!

Donated Chair

So, since joining http://www.scoliosis-support.org/ I have been feeling so much… well…..support I suppose J.

I had an email the other day from a nurse who mentioned that I may not be able to go on holiday as you are not allowed surgery until you are back 6 weeks. I panicked! But then calmed down and called around it took a lot of the day to get a concrete answer but I CAN still go on holiday, I should wear flight socks though and take some asprin on the flight (guess that helps me not get blood clots).

So I am now VERY excited about my holiday.

Also I have been asking around about things to take to hospital with me, I had thought of all kinds of things but it didn’t ever cross my mind to think of a CHAIR. That’s probably the most obvious thing as well. Anyway a lovely lady is donating me her daughters chair. Im so pleased I just need to make my boyfriend go and collect it (my dads car is more like a tank and I cannot drive it!). I am hoping I may be able to ask her a few questions about the surgery also. I don’t think I can ever pick too many peoples brains about this.

So as things start approaching I am going to spend this weekend packing for my holiday and making sure I have enough bikini’s to wear J. And I have all the girls from work coming round on Sunday to meet Alan and Splat and have some nice girlie chats and nibbles.

I feel pretty relaxed about everything at the moment, I just hope I am brave enough to actually go through with it!.

Thank you my spinal fusioned friends!!.

I have been getting so many encouraging emails from people stumbling across this blog who have had the operation. I cannot tell you how brilliant it is to read ‘its the best decision I have ever made’ which I have now read quite a few times.

I really do appreciate everyone giving me tips and telling me about their experiences. Obviously it will be painful but as it is often described ‘manageable’ (although if I experience any pain I often make a right song and dance about it, so we will see on that one!!!).

If any of you can think of things I should take to the hospital with me that might make mine or my families stay more comfortable please let me know, and I am going to try and put a list together (who would have thought I would ever get organized about anything!!).

I am currently looking online for a little table that can go over my bed for when I get home, and a tempur mattress and pillow as these seem to be popular amongst recovering spinal fusioneers.

Anyway, please keep sending me your lovely emails, I don’t think I can ever read too many blogs or too many success stories. And I really really hope one day this blog might help someone else!.

Pre-Op Appointment

So I got my Pre-Op appointment. To be honest I didn’t even know I would need a Pre-Op or even what one is!! (such a newbie to this whole surgery thing). Having read A LOT of Scoliosis blogs and forums (www.Scoliosis-Support.org  if you are keen to know) I realized I will need to have one of these. As I am in Thailand right before surgery for 3 weeks and then I go straight in I thought I had better let the hospital know.

My appointment is 18April at 9am, haven’t a clue what it will involve although I am sure I heard the woman mention blood tests which does not sound too cool. Anyway I am big enough and ugly enough to cope with that. Not much choice.

I have to say from the Receptionist, to the Secretaries to Mr Tucker himself everyone has been so helpful and lovely. They seem to understand how frightening it is and are just super friendly.

I am trying to get everything organized for before I go on holiday, I need a bed to be sorted out, my animals to be looked after, I wanna be packed, I want to have bought some kind of implements to help me when I get home.

Also I forgot to mention my dad, who I will be staying with when I get home, has decided that when I have my operation it’s a perfect time to move so he has found a new cottage and will be completing just after I get out of hospital it looks like. I really don’t think he realizes that looking after me is going to a nightmare. I hope I am not going to be too much of a burden.

Money Money Money!!!

Good Afternoon! So it turns out that BUPA will no pay for all my surgery fee’s as Mr Tucker doesn’t charge within ‘their’ guidelines. So there will be a shortfall to pay of about £1,500 and that isn’t including the out patients fee’s which will need to be paid by me when I am discharged as I have used up all my £1000 outpatients allowance on appointments and xrays.

Bupa’s recommendation was to find a different Surgeon. Are they crazy!! The whole reason to go private is to get the best possible Surgeon and not have to wait around. To be honest having my back operated on is biggest deal in my entire life and I have decided that the only man for the job is Mr Tucker.

Anyway I will discuss it with my dad and see if I can borrow the money from him. To be honest with you its not like I am going to be doing much for a good few months so it might be easy to save!, unless I go mad with bordem and get addicted to online gambling. If that happens I am in trouble as I have no self control with those kind of things. When I went to Vegas I was playing slot machines right up until it was time to board the plane (who has slot machines in an airport?!!! VEGAS BABY!!).

I am gonna try and ring Bupa and see if there is any room for maneuvering.

Scoliosis Surgery Blogging

HR were brilliant about the operation and its such a weight of my mind for them to be so supportive. The last thing I wanted/needed was to be a burden to work and worry about that throughout my recovery.

I haven’t really been about to think/talk about much else since yesterday it all seems so much more real now to have the date set.

So this morning I thought I would put my mind at rest a read some other Scoliosis Surgery blog and survival stories. There are some brilliant ones out there, and it really has helped me feel stronger and I kind of thing if they can get through it then why cant i?.

Laurens Scoliosis Blog Article

This is a blog post by Lauren, she shows you pictures and she looks AMAZING after her operation, all straight and just beautiful, I wanna be like Lauren, he scar has faded so well just a teeny tiny line. I emailed her to say thank you for being so inspirational. I really hope after my operation people will read this blog and it will help them just like everyone else’s blogs are helping me.

If I come across any other reading material that has made me smile I will pass it on…

If anyone reading this is going through the same things as me, or has been there, done that and got the tshirt then please feel free to email me on handscanderson@gmail.com I am quite surprised by the amount of hits I am getting already!

Dr's Appointment Results

Also my MRI results were normal which is brilliant, one less thing.

Mr Tucker seems so nice and has such a lovely sense of humour, he is very good at getting across the fact that it is a HUGE operation to undertake but also keeps it as light hearted as possible. He is also very honest about the complications that may arise and wasn’t shy is telling me how much pain I will be in (although I wish he had lied! Hahah).

He says that it shouldn’t really affect my mobility in anyway and I shouldn’t get any further complications throughout my life, in pregnancy etc (although having an epidural will need to be put in very low down, but its still possible which is good). Obviously in all major surgery there are risks but these seem minimal in comparison to what will happen if I don’t get it done.

He sounds like he does these operations ALL the time and I really am not a special case, I guess its like me processing a Travel Request form J just a very very complex one!.

So this morning I came in and told Lindsay (my boss/best friend) how it all went at the drs and she as always she makes me feel better and THEN I get a called from Sharon who is Mr Tucker’s secretary and she has scheduled me in for the surgery on 12^th May ARGH. That is 3days after Thailand, which I initially thought would be good but actually, lets face it I am going to be sunning myself petrified of going home!! Hehehe oh well I just need to harden the fuck up - as another one of my dearest friends would say.

My next 2 obstacles are getting it signed off by BUPA and talking to Jo in HR and getting my time off approved. Which reminds me the dr did say that I should be ok to work from home after about 6 weeks, well he kind of hinted that I could probably work from home before that but I think it really does depend, he didn’t really seem to what to be held to anything. Either way I love my job and I know I will be so bored (and probably in agony, ARGH) that I will actually miss everyone and working. 3 months off for getting your back sliced and diced really will not be fun.

Lindsay (boss) is going to speak to Jo (HR) this afternoon and I am really nervous about this so we shall see what happens there….

Tonight in honour of pancake day I am going to make my Timmykins a nice pancake with my posh frying pan and forget all about my curly wurlyness.

Day the of the Dr Appointment!

Today is the day, I have my MRI scan CD in my handbag, I have my dad coming to meet me at the train station and I have a nervous tummy.

It is the day for my follow up meeting with Mr Tucker to discuss the surgery. I am pretty nervous, I don’t know why!! Its not like he will get his scalpel out there and then and cut me open!, so goodness knows why I am nervous.

My kiwikins AKA my boyfriend is arriving back from the Kiwi Wilderness at 11.55am to be precise! That’s if his flight lands on time and then he needs to drop his bag off and get to the drs so I don’t think he will make it. Which is ok as I think that’s even more nerve wracking. Its weird, im weird J.

Will write again tomorrow after the appointment.

Open MRI Hamburger

I did it!!!!! So I managed to make it through the Open MRI. This may sounds like a walk in the park to some of you but for me being completely claustrophobic and having had the WORST experience when I last time tried to go through a closed MRI or as I like to call it The White Tunnel Of Death.

So anyway this thing was like a massive plastic hamburger and I was the filling, when I looked at it I really didn’t think that just the fact you could see out of the sides would make a difference, because I just hate the fact that there is something so close to your face and you cant sit up, if that makes sense.

Anyway the woman was lovely and talked me through everything for the first 45mins even though I was right under she let me have my head to the side so I guess it kind of helped that I sound see out and then by the time it got to the point where she strapped my head in and I had to look up I must have been quite relaxed because although I didn’t enjoy it and when I think about it now I tense up, I managed to do it!.

Yes I did think I may hypo ventilate but I concentrated on my breathing and I was so pleased with myself (as I was sure I was going to run from this place as fast as I could).

I have the CD in my sticky mitts and I will take this to see Mr Tucker on Monday with my dad and hopefully my boyfriend.

I wonder if I put the CD in my computer I will be able to see the images…. I might give it a whirl…..

Claustrophobic Chrissy's Open MRI Anxiety

So, I have seen pictures of the open MRI. Wish I didn’t look now because its completely not what I expected!

To be honest I don’t really know what I expected I guess I thought it was like a shallow donut type machine that you went through with your legs out one end and your head out there other, so you were looking out at the ceiling. But it doesn’t look like that in the pictures. It has open sides but then still what looks to me like a low top. I can handle closed sides but I seem to HATE the feeling of not being able to sit if I really really needed too.

I know its weird, I know I am very weird.. but ARGHHH. And my mum cant come with me coz she has to work and I have some lovely friends at work who have offered to come but I think that they might make me laugh and I think I would also feel self conscious, maybe I will ask my dad but I ask him for so many favours I feel abit bad.

Fancy this, worried about an OPEN MRI when I have a whole bucket load of surgery that will be 10 million trillon times worse.

I am feeling pretty anxious a lot at the moment I am blowing everything up into such a huge deal. I feel like I have constantly had a huge amount of caffeine and it’s a sick wired feeling and its horrible. I had to take a valium at work yesterday and I hadn’t taken any of that for a while and it made me feel so weird and drunk I fell up the stairs on the way to a meeting. Was fun though, I would prefer to feel like that and chilled.

I have my follow up meeting with Mr Stewart Tucker booked on Monday 7March, which is the day my beloved Timiney Cricket gets back. He arrives into Gatwick at about 11am and my appointment is at 15.15, I really hope he can make it as my mum cant because she is in Boston, of course my Dad will be there supporting me but im pretty sure Tim will have some good questions up his sleeve.

I decided against going back for my Theraflex appointment today I emailed and cancelled and explained how I will now be having surgery, but I will definitely go back and see her if I do get any pain between now and then.

Got my Open MRI date

The date of my MRI is Wednesday 2March at 9.40am. I am going to brave it and go alone at my mum is working. Things are progressing!

100 Scoliosis Surgery Questions

So I got a brilliant email last night from my best friend’s brother answering all my questions on Scoliosis Surgery, and the poor boy had A LOT of questions to answer.

He was so upbeat and positive, and has just made me feel 100x’s better about everything. I wont copy the whole email over as I don’t have his permission but here is a couple of sentence’s that made me realize that if I was having any doubts I would be silly to pay attention to them.

“I would DEFINITELY have the op again if I needed to, and do not regret it AT ALL. Apart from the physical benefits in the long run, friends said there was a noticeable difference in my personality and mood”

“I know its really hard, but the best thing is to probably prepare yourself (like you are), but not WORRY too much - you'll end up a wreck if you constantly worry between now and your op! In probably about a years time, you'll be saying what a great life experience it was and how much it changed you for the better. ;) Theres ups and downs, like with anything, but its totally worth it all in the end.”

How wonderful is that?!!!!

Also I got a call from Sharon, Mr StewartTucker’s secretary and she told me he has referred me to Harley Street for my open MRI and I should hear from them within the next couple of days and then I need to make a follow up appointment with Mr StewartTucker and my parents and hopefully Tim my boyfriend (if he is back from NZ).

My big aim between now and mid April is to get everything sorted out. MRI, get Bupa to sign off my surgery, set a date for the op and talk to work once all that is sorted then hopefully I can just relax in Thailand on holiday, I REALLY don’t want anything hanging over me (obviously the impending doomsday will still be there!! J)